“When I was searching for an example at work to practice the tools, my relationship with my Dad kept cropping up...

...I realized it was something I had to address. He and I had been distrusting each other around the death of a relative and who should manage her estate. I wasn't trusting his intentions, and in turn, he wasn't trusting mine. He accused me of wanting to take her money and it was breaking my heart. I was the one by her bedside for the last months she was alive, caring for her in her suffering and it was an obligation for me to steward her resources in her death. My Dad's language was hurtful and I wasn't sure if I was ever going to be able to forgive him for treating me this way.

As I walked through the exercises, recognizing how God is at work in this situation, it became clear that my Dad's reaction was not about me but about his own grief, and the Christlike response was not one of judgment or anger against my Dad, but simply letting him know what it was like to be with this relative in her last days, and reassuring my Dad that she cared for him.

Just after we did the practice session, and prayed for God's assistance, my phone rang. It was my Dad. I was able to explain to him exactly what I had just articulated in the Kingdom Orientation Worksheet, with the assurance and honesty of a Christ-led heart, and the response from my Dad was beautiful. We shared a moment of love and appreciation, and I hung up the phone feeling like whatever I give up to God, no matter how hard it is, when I apply these frameworks, the relationship outcomes will be fruit-bearing. I am so grateful for these resources. Thank you!"

Tracy Mathews